we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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