think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
