I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
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