I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
