This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
Randomize
