they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
