What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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