I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
