lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Randomize
