Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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