woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
i came on her dog
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Randomize
