I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
Randomize
