You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
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Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
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He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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