Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
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