Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
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