Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Randomize
