I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
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