If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
