OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
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