I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Randomize
