I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
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