I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize