This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize
