I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Randomize