my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
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