5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
It's blow job season.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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