Jerry, you need to find god
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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