Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize
