dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize