I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Randomize
