someone get that fucking seahorse.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
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