Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
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