yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
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