I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Brb crying the tears of my youth
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize