You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
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We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
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