How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
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