I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
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And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
If its not for food we ain't going out.
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Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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