when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
