What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Randomize
