FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
Randomize
