well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Randomize