What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Randomize
