you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
Randomize
