I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize