did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
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