Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
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