This is not my ceiling
On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
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