If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
