In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Randomize
