Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
